


All We See is Light

by funnygirlthatbelle13



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Autistic Caleb Widogast, Birthday, Found Family, Gen, Hints of Angst Cuz Backstory, Shadowgast if You Squink, lots of love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-16
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2020-09-02 12:29:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20275942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/funnygirlthatbelle13/pseuds/funnygirlthatbelle13
Summary: All we see is light/Cause the sun burns bright/We could be alright for forever this way/Two friends/True friends/On a perfect dayAKA Caleb celebrates his birthday for the first time in twenty years, and the Mighty Nein are extremely loving.





	All We See is Light

**Author's Note:**

> Welp, I've been working on this for over a month. Hopefully you guys enjoy it! Before we get started, I just wanted to thank Blair_the_Bold for her help in editing and coming up with good gifts for Caleb to receive plus the Queer Machina and Irondad discord servers for help with the title. Enjoy!

Caleb rolled over as he woke up, instinctively using his arm to block the light coming from his window. Light? In Rosohna? He sat up, blinking into focus as his mind began to process what he was seeing. Surely enough, sunlight was pouring through his window. Caleb moved towards the window, a smile creeping onto his face as he practically felt the vitamins his skin was soaking up. He remembered Essek telling them how the city would occasionally let the sun in on religious holidays, but this was the first time it had happened since the Nein had been in Xhorhas. He seriously considered grabbing his things and running out into the city, but a bundle at the foot of his bed caught his attention first.

Caleb stepped over Frumpkin, who was curled up in the middle of the floor, to examine it better. It was a package wrapped in brown paper and tied with twine. Attached was a small note in Jester’s handwriting, which he read.

_Happy birthday, Caleb! Here’s a little something from all of us!_

He smiled and began unwrapping the gift, grateful if not a little surprised that his friends had remembered. A month and six days ago, the Nein had been enjoying some post-battle drinks when the topic of birthdays had been brought up. They had gone around the table, determining when each member of the party’s birthday was and supplying guesses as to Fjord’s, and it had eventually come to him.

“What about you, Caleb?” Jester had asked as she sipped on her milk, “When is your birthday?”

“Hold on, let me think for a minute,” he had muttered, wracking his brain.

“Don’t you remember everything?” Fjord had teased with a hiccup.

“It is not instantaneous,” he had explained, “If I haven’t thought about something in a while, it’s hard to remember.”

“But like,” Beau had interjected, slurring slightly, “Aren’t birthdays… aren’t they, like, super important information that you should definitely remember?”

His cheeks had gone red at that point, and he had tried to avoid making eye contact with anyone. “Yes, well, I haven’t had one since I was thirteen, so…”

Things had gotten awkward after that, so he had simply spit out the date and gone to bed. But now it was his birthday, his first birthday that he hadn’t been in the woods or an asylum or being experimented on since he had gotten to the Academy, and he was admittedly curious what his first birthday present in twenty years would be.

What it turned out to be was an emerald green velour bathrobe that felt beautifully soft to the touch. The inside was lined with some sort of dark gray fur that felt so delicate, so soft… Caleb put it on, grinning as he felt the cozy material all around his body. He tied the robe around his waist tightly and made his way downstairs towards the kitchen.

“Mornin’, sleeping beauty,” Beau called out to him as he entered the dining room, “Happy birthday.”

“It’s not that late,” Caleb said as he stifled a small yawn, “It’s 9:32. And thank you, Beauregard.”

The monk smiled at him, and Caleb was surprised to feel a contented smile form on his face. As he stood there, Caduceus’ head popped through the doorway into the kitchen.

“Happy birthday, Mr. Caleb,” he said with a smile, “Are you about ready for breakfast?”

Only now did Caleb notice the smell of freshly baked bread emanating from the kitchen. As he stood there, he picked up the familiar scent of sourdough.

“Is that… baurenbrot?” he asked, staring at Caduceus in confusion. The firbolg smiled. “How did you-“

“One of the families in the graveyard had a little old Zemnian woman who’d married in at one point. When her husband spent time with his ancestors, she taught me and my sister how to bake bread,” he explained, “I figured that I’d give it a shot again.”

“Do you need any help?” Caleb offered, and it was like he was back home in Blumenthal. Caduceus smiled, and Caleb couldn’t help but wonder if his friend was capable of reading minds.

“Yeah, setting the table would be nice.”

With Beau’s help, the table was quickly set for seven. The two loaves of baurenbrot were accompanied by butter, honey, and jams as well as a pot of tea. Caleb stared at the table, warm memories of his childhood flooding his mind.

“Don’t put your hands in these, okay?” Beau teased, “We’re all eating them.”

Caduceus turned to her, confused, as Caleb blushed.

“It’s a thing I have done since I was a child,” he explained, “You take the bread, tear it in half, and use it to keep your hands warm when you don’t have gloves.”

“Hm, I never thought of that,” Caduceus mused before calling, “Breakfast is ready!” to the rest of the house. Four sets of feet could be heard rushing towards the dining room as the three who were already there sat down.

“Happy birthday, Caleb!” Jester shouted as she ran in, hugging him tightly from behind.

“Danke, Jester,” he muttered, clumsily patting her hand as he did so.

She released her grip on him, plopping down next to Beau as Nott rounded the corner.

“It’s weird seeing the sun out,” she commented as she took the seat next to Caleb’s. He felt her grab his hand, squeeze it, and a small weight be placed in it. He opened his hand and saw a small silver button. He smiled and pocketed it.

“Happy birthday, Caleb,” she said with a gentle smile. Now it was his turn to grab her hand and squeeze it.

Caleb was so caught up in the moment that he missed Fjord entering the room entirely.

“Morning, Caleb,” he drawled as he ruffled his hand in Caleb’s hair, “Happy birthday.”

Normally, Caleb would have hated to be the center of attention like this, but something was different about this scenario. He felt no pressure from them; he didn’t have to do anything. No one expected him to perform, just be.

“That smells wonderful, Caduceus,” Yasha said as she entered the dining room. Caduceus smiled and began to slice into the first loaf.

“I hope it’s authentic,” Caduceus murmured as he began to serve them.

They all began to chat as they ate breakfast. Caleb smiled as he ate the bread with butter and honey. It was not exactly like how his mother made baurenbrot, but this bread was closer to what he had grown up with than anything he had had in years.

“Caduceus, this is wonderful,” he said eventually. His friend smiled serenely.

“Good, I’m glad.”

“Yes, it’s very nice,” Yasha agreed.

“Do you like your present, Caleb?” Jester asked, leaning across the table to brush a crumb off of his new robe.

“Ja, ja, it’s… very nice. I don’t know if I’ve ever had something this nice.”

Jester squealed in excitement. “Oh, I’m so glad! I knew it!”

“You like the, uh, color?” Fjord asked awkwardly.

“Ja, it’s very nice.”

“Green’s a good color on you,” Beau piped up. Caleb blushed a little following the unexpected compliment.

“I’m only asking because it took us quite some time to come to an agreement,” Fjord said, seeming to understand that Caleb wasn’t prepared to be the center of attention like this for this long.

“It took us, like an hour,” Jester added, “I still think the purple one would’ve been very handsome, but this green is very elegant.”

“Danke,” Caleb muttered as he finished his breakfast, “I think I’m going to go up to the garden and read now.”

As he left the room, he heard Yasha call out from behind: “Happy birthday!”

Caleb moved quickly throughout the house, grabbing a book on the history of Xhorhas and Frumpkin as he made his way up to the garden. From their tower, he could just make out a large congregation in the Lucid Bastion. Entering the garden, the smell of the various plants Caduceus had succeeded in growing calmed the slight hint of anxiety he hadn’t registered that he was feeling.

“I wonder,” he muttered as he walked closer to the trunk of their giant tree. The tree Caduceus had magically produced was approximately sixty feet high, but the magical lights certainly didn’t go up that high, he reasoned. Perhaps he could get some natural sunlight? With some effort, Caleb managed to clamber up a little more than halfway up the tree, to the point where sunshine, natural sunshine, was filtering through the leaves. With a satisfied huff, he opened his book and began to read. He spent the next hour and a half reading up on the history of Xhorhas with Frumpkin cuddling next to him before he heard a voice in his ear.

“Caleb, do you want some company up there? We won’t come if you don’t want us to. You can respond to this message,” Nott said through her message spell.

“Ja, you can up here if you like… I am up a tree.”

It took a couple of minutes, but eventually he heard rustling at the bottom of the tree.

“Hello,” he said, not looking up from his book.

“Hi, Caleb!” Jester called from the bottom of the tree. He didn’t hear anything, but he felt the branch shake slightly. Closing the book, Caleb saw Nott climbing up towards him. He smiled at her warmly.

“Wow, it’s great up here,” she commented as she reached the branch where he was resting.

“Ja, I am enjoying the tree more than I expected.” Nott crawled into his lap, staring at him with a smile. Caleb absentmindedly ran his fingers through her hair. The weight in his lap felt comforting.

“Are you enjoying your birthday?”

“Mhm,” he said casually, “It’s not often we get a chance to unwind.” She chuckled at this, familiar with the insanity that was living in the Xhorhouse.

They sat together in silence for a while, Nott focused on Caleb and Caleb focused on his book. And as the sun shone through the canopy of the tree, Caleb slowly fell asleep. When he woke up, Nott was still curled up in his lap, smiling softly in his direction. He ran a finger through her hair as he smiled fondly at her.

“It is almost two thirty,” he informed her, “We’ve wasted most of the day away.”

“It’s not a waste if you’ve enjoyed it. Having a lazy day every once in a while is nice, especially on days like today.”

There was a pause as Caleb mulled this over in his brain.

“You are enjoying today, aren’t you?” Nott asked nervously.

“Ja, ja, I am,” he assured her, “It has just… it has been a long time.” She nodded solemnly.

“Yes, well, consider today making up for lost time.” And with that, Nott kissed him on the cheek before scurrying down the tree.

As it turned out, climbing up a tree is much easier than climbing down. It took Caleb an embarrassingly long time to navigate his way back down to the ground. He had barely made it back into the house before literally running into Fjord.

“Hey,” the half-orc said, “So I’m supposed to tell you that, and these are Jester’s exact words:_ Cay-leb, you should totally take a bath or float in the water or something cuz we’re gonna have company over and you probably don’t want to be smelly at your special birthday dinner_,” the latter half of the sentence in a near perfect impression of Jester.

Caleb smiled for Fjord; he deserved it after that performance, but his mind was already racing trying to figure out who the hell would be over for dinner.

“Only one person is coming over,” Fjord assured him. It was strangely comforting that his friend knew him so well that he didn’t have to say a word for him to know what was worrying him. “Just one guest for dinner and maybe a nightcap. We didn’t want to overwhelm you, but a party does need guests.”

“Did Jester also say that?” Caleb muttered, still freaking out a little about their mysterious dinner guest, though less so knowing that it was only one person.

“Yeah, she’s pretty excited to have a birthday party bigger than her, her mom, and Blude, I guess.”

Caleb felt that statement like a punch in the stomach. Of course, today was more significant than just his birthday. It was more important than him. It was Jester’s first birthday party with someone her own age. It was Beau’s first celebration that wasn’t supervised by her family or the monks. It was Fjord’s first time being involved in anything like this. It was a small semblance of normalcy in their crazy, tragic lives, and that was far bigger than him.

“I think a soak will be nice,” he murmured, walking away towards the hot tub.

As he submerged his entire body except his face into the warm, bubbling water, Caleb had to admit that it felt wonderful. It felt as if he had no body, he was merely a consciousness floating out in the universe. He floated in the water for several minutes, letting his anxieties be washed away same as the dirt, when someone knocked on the door.

“Caleb?” the gentle voice of Yasha called through the door, “Could I come in for a minute?”

“Ja,” he called back without even thinking. He didn’t really want to be around people right now, but Yasha didn’t count as people.

Caleb stood up in the tub and turned to watch her enter, a large bundle of cloth in her arms.

“You don’t have to stop what you’re doing,” she said, “I just thought you’d like to have your clothes and razor and stuff here when you needed them, and Jester said you could use her fancy soaps.”

“Oh,” he muttered, avoiding making eye contact with her and instead looking at the stuff she was holding, noticing the glint of his razor amongst the pile. Yasha was placing the items on the ground when he spoke again. “You don’t have to leave, you know.”

“Would you like me to shave you?” she offered.

“You don’t have to. But… you don’t have to leave if you don’t want to.”

“Okay,” Yasha said, and she began to take off her boots and roll up her pants, “Would you like it if I washed your hair?”

He thought about it for a moment, imagining how that might feel on his skin.

“Ja, ja… that would be nice.”

Yasha sat down at the side of the hot tub, letting her feet and ankles get wet as she was beside him. They sat like that, him in the hot tub and her sitting on the edge, both silent for a little over a minute.

“Alright, well, should we try this?” she offered.

“Ja,” he muttered, adjusting himself so that his head was resting between her knees. It felt strangely comforting, he realized, to depend on her. Yasha was extremely gentle, her tough fingers making small, delicate circles around his scalp like some sort of dance. Caleb couldn’t help but wonder if this was how Frumpkin felt when being pet, and a blissful sound escaped his mouth.

“Am I being too rough?” Yasha asked, stopping. He opened his eyes (he hadn’t even noticed that he’d closed them) and saw her staring at him, looking more concerned than he expected; though the fact that she was upside down made it harder to read her expression.

“Nein, this is wonderful,” he assured her.

She began to massage the shampoo into his scalp, and he let out a contented sigh.

“People are the worst,” he said, “I’m so glad you’re not people, Yasha.”

“Thank you?”

“Oh no,” he said, his eyes shooting open, “I meant… I meant that as a good thing. People are judgmental and rude and take energy to deal with…. You are better than people; I don’t get tired of being around you.”

The strange upside down expression Yasha was wearing changed into what he recognized as a soft smile. “I’m… I’m glad you…. I feel the same way about you, Caleb,” she said barely above a whisper.

“Holla,” he muttered. She laughed a little at that and resumed shampooing his hair in silence for another two minutes before having him dunk his head.

“Are the others people?” she asked as he came back up.

“Not-not always,” he said, “Today a bit more than normal.” He opened his eyes and saw that she was grabbing additional shampoo, nodding to herself.

“Everyone is very… excited,” she agreed, “They want you to be happy. It is a special day. I’m going to put this in your beard so it will be easier to shave,” she warned before beginning to work the shampoo into his beard.

“It is… a lot,” he admitted, careful not to get the expensive soap in his mouth, “I do not want to disappoint them.”

“I don’t think you can disappoint anyone,” she assured him, “At least, not in this situation. They just want you to have a good day.”

There was a pause as she worked at untangling a particularly stubborn knot.

“What if we had a signal? So if people are being too much, we can let the other know and get out of there?”

“Ja, okay,” he said, “What should it be?”

They took another six minutes or so going through potential signals while Yasha carefully used the straight razor against his cheeks before they agreed on biting their thumb.

“So if things get too much tonight, or ever really, we can just…” Yasha trailed off as she bit her thumb.

Caleb practiced the gesture back at her. She smiled and dragged the razor against his jawline.

“Alright, we’re done,” she said with a smile, “I’ll let you relax for a little while. The clothes are right over there,” she gestured behind her, “I used your measurements to get you an extra set of clothes.”

“That must have been expensive,” he commented.

“Not really,” she said, “Besides, Caduceus pitched in.” She smiled at him gently, running a hand through his soaking hair. “Happy birthday, Caleb,” she said, blush creeping up her cheeks as she stood up.

As she exited the room, Caleb sank completely into the water. He stared up at the distorted image of the roots, letting himself enjoy the sensory deprivation for a good five minutes before climbing out to get dressed. Given that Yasha and Caduceus were the ones who’d gotten this outfit for him, he didn’t expect it to suit him. However, he was pleasantly surprised to find that he liked what they had gotten him. The white blouse had rather poofy sleeves that didn’t put pressure on his scarred arms in a way that felt surprisingly good, and the high collar felt snug and nice. The long, blue, sleeveless vest reminded him a bit of Avantika, but the weight was good and the silver trim was very pretty. And the grey pants fit him exceptionally well. Satisfied with his new threads, Caleb stepped out into the main area of the house and was overwhelmed by the scent of something baking.

“Caleb, you look so handsome!” Jester cried, waving at him. She was standing on top of a chair hanging a banner that read _Happy Birthday, Caleb!_ in pink and blue ink, with random arcane symbols painted all over.

“Danke, Jester,” he mumbled, blushing and staring at his feet, “What is… what is everyone up to?”

“Oh, well I’m decorating,” she said, “And I’m pretty sure Nott and Caduceus are in the kitchen. And Fjord, Beau, and Yasha are working on something up in Fjord’s room? But you can’t go in there!”

“Ah… okay. I think I’m going to go read for a bit, ja?”

“Oh, okay,” he looked up and saw that Jester was watching him attentively, looking sad? “Do you want company?”

“I do not want to interrupt or-ah… get in the way of the plans.”

“Caleb,” Jester said, climbing down from the chair towards him, “We have plans because we wanna make you happy. But if there’s something else that would make you happy, then we can do that instead. This is your day!”

He smiled at her, taking a deep breath.

“Ja… okay…” he muttered as he sat down in one of the chairs she wasn’t using to hang up decorations, snapping Frumpkin onto his lap and pulling out his book as he did so.

Caleb sat there for another hour and a half, reading and petting Frumpkin while Jester worked on the decorations. Occasionally, she asked for his opinion or for help blowing up balloons, but they mostly kept to themselves while together. Her cheerful humming was pleasant rather than distracting, and Caleb found himself settling into a state of contentment. Eventually, Jester finished decorating and much to Caleb’s surprise, she sat down in the chair next to him and silently pressed her head into his arm. Without thinking, he adjusted so that his arm was around her. They sat together like that for a good twenty minutes before a gentle tapping at the door sent Jester running.

“Hi!” Jester said to their guest, “Come on in!”

Their chimes rang as the guest walked, or rather, glided into the living room.

“I hope I’m not late,” Essek said with a smile, “Happy birthday.”

Essek always looked impressive, but today, he was exceptionally handsome. The Shadowhand was not wearing his typical mantle and dark robes. Instead, he was sporting a royal blue robe and a silver sash. Caleb stood up, awkwardly smiling at his esteemed guest.

“Hallo,” he mumbled, “I, uh, hope that you weren’t… that we didn’t pester you too much.”

Essek smiled at him, his face in that expression of his that Caleb could never quite identify.

“Not at all. My invitation was,” he glanced over at Jester at this point, “charming.”

“I’m going to tell everyone you’re here!” Jester said brightly, “Have party hats on by the time I come back!” She gestured at an assortment of colorful paper hats that had been laid out on the table earlier in the day.

Once Jester was out of the room, an awkward silence grew between them.

“This should be interesting,” Essek commented pleasantly, “A first for me.”

“Ja, me too… at least, the first in many, many years.”

“Are there usually… is it always so colorful?” He gestured to the rainbow of decorations all around them.

“Mine never were, but I’m sure Jester’s were something like this.”

With a chuckle and a small flick of his wrist, Essek cast a spell that caused a matching pair of blue hats float onto each of their heads. The Shadowhand chuckled as the paper hat landed on his head, and Caleb couldn’t help but laugh at the preposterousness of the situation.

At that point, Nott came running in and dragged them to the dining room, going on about how she and Caduceus had been making dinner. Everyone else was waiting, it seemed, at the table.

“Nice threads!” Beau called, wolf whistling at him. Caleb rolled his eyes at her. “Come on, give us a spin!” she teased. Before he could even flick her off, Caduceus had called her to bring in a dish.

“Oh, wow, are those potato pancakes?” Fjord asked, watching the dish be set down.

“Kartoffelpuffer,” Caleb said, “That is the Zemnian name.”

Essek turned to him with a puzzled expression on his face as Jester ran back to the living room to grab her hats. “I am unfamiliar with that term.”

“The, um, the Zemni people were conquered by the Empire centuries ago. But we are… a stubborn people… and we have not let our culture die out entirely.”

“Mister Caleb,” Caduceus said, his head popping in from the kitchen, “Would you mind tasting this before I start plating to make sure it doesn’t need anything?”

“Excuse me,” he said to Essek, who simply smiled at him.

“I do not mind.” Caleb stepped into the kitchen and was overwhelmed by smells, each scent connected to a memory like a thread, all weaving together to form a sense of nostalgia he had long since forgotten. Images of laying in bed sick, of sneaking ingredients off the table to snack on when no one was looking, of children huddling together trying to read the same book as Wulfie’s parents laughed to themselves… With a slightly trembling hand, Caleb took the spoon offered by Caduceus and allowed himself to taste the broth. It felt like being on the receiving hand of a warm hug and a slap in the face at the same time. He reached towards where Caduceus kept the spices and ground in a little black pepper.

“Vollkommen, perfect.”

With a satisfied smile, Caduceus began to spoon the soup into bowls that had already been partially filled with pieces of crepes.

“It’s been… many years since I last had flädlesuppe,” Caleb said as he carefully picked up a couple bowls, “It is… it’s good to reconnect, remember the good times, ja?”

Caduceus said nothing but instead led the way back out into the dining room. Now everyone was wearing the little party hats that Jester had made and passing out bowls and sitting down at the table. The meal was nothing but pleasant. The flädlesuppe was aromatic and flavorful, the kartoffelpuffer wonderfully crispy, the Xhorhasian fruits coming very close to tasting like apples in the sauce, the mead and wine Beau had selected were just strong enough, and the conversation was surprisingly easy. Everyone was sharing stories of their favorite moments with the group as Essek laughed and tried to predict what would happen next.

“It’s pinataaaaa time!” Jester sang with a giggle. She normally never drank, but tonight, she had had one glass of wine and was quite tipsy from it.

It took some time for Beau and Jester to drunkenly explain the concept of piñatas to the rest of them, earning a “...fascinating,” from Essek. And it had taken even longer for them to actually break open the papier-mâché cat, the final blow being struck by Nott of all people.

“I’m the best, motherfuckas!” she screamed, throwing candy at Fjord, “Suck it!”

“I only saw her drink one glass of wine,” Essek whispered out of the corner of his mouth to Caleb, “Is she already drunk?”

“Nein,” Caleb said with an affectionate chuckle, “she is just… like that.”

“How about a nightcap and some presents?” Fjord suggested, doing his best not to laugh at the goblin trash talking him from below his waistline.

“Presents?” Caleb repeated.

“Duh,” Jester said, “Of course we have presents for you!”

“I’ll go get them,” Yasha offered, “The wrapping is a little messy, though.”

“I’ll help,” Fjord offered, and the two of them had ran upstairs to grab the clumsily wrapped gifts.

All sitting back at the dining room table, Caleb had begun to open his presents. From Beauregard was a set of bracers with a similar enchantment as her own, with small flames engraved into them.

“The guy judged me when I asked if he could do cat paws,” she explained, “So this was the next best thing.”

Yasha had gifted a small cat toy shaped like a mouse, and Caleb quickly discovered that he could feel the effects of the catnip when he was seeing through his familiar.

Caduceus had concocted a blend of tea specifically suited to Caleb’s tastes and needs.

“There’s some black tea leaves there for flavor, the lavender is a nice floral note and is good at reducing stress levels, the holy basil helps with memory and sleep, lemongrass is soothing and helps your body fall asleep naturally, and the chamomile does all of the above and rounds out the flavor,” Caduceus explained, pointed to the different leaves and such in the lilac pot, “It’s a very feel good blend.”

Caleb was blown away by the level of thought and effort that the firbolg has put into the gift. “I-I-I… thank you,” he barely managed to say, leaning in his chair so that his head was pressed into Caduceus’ side. The gesture wasn’t enough, it never was, but the way his friend smiled made Caleb relatively confident that his intentions had gotten through.

Fjord’s gift was very kind: three hardback novels with embossed covers and intricate designs. The first was a lilac colored book with silver trimmed pages and a cover that read _Myths and Fairytales of the East_ in silver looping letters. The second one had a black leather cover and the title _Murder at Manderly_ written in red. The final book was blue and gold, with a clasp keeping it closed. The title read _The Treasure of Darktow_.

“I wasn’t sure exactly what you’d like,” Fjord explained, “So I tried to cover my bases as best I could: myths and legends, mystery and romance, and… pirate adventures, I suppose.”

Caleb was barely listening as he stared at the three gorgeous books, most likely worth a small fortune. He felt his hands flapping, glanced up and saw that no one seemed to care, and began to flap even faster.

“I’m glad you like them,” Fjord said with a grin.

“I don’t know if I can top the books,” Nott said, “But here.”

She handed him a scroll, which turned out to be a spell scroll for the spell Fire Shield.

“It’s like your entire thing!” she explained, “Fire and protecting yourself!”

Caleb got up and moved around the table to her, bending down to give her a kiss on the forehead.

“Thank you, liebling,” he whispered, “Danke.”

“Here, open mine!” Jester said. Caleb ripped open the packaging to find an art history book.

“Oh,” he said, “That is very nice.”

“Now cast identify on it,” Jester suggested, looking at Essek.

Essek began muttering the familiar spell under his breath.

“It is a disguise. The real book is _Tusk Love_.”

“But it isn’t,” she whispered, “Caleb, open it up!”

He did as she told, and found blank pages. “It’s empty.”

“There are two enchantments so you can have a super secret notebook. So even if somebody tries to be super sneaky and see what you’re reading, they’ll just think you’re reading smut!”

“That’s kind of brilliant,” Beau commented.

“It’s definitely something,” Fjord said.

“I am sure it will prove very useful,” Caleb said, “Danke.”

“I also have brought gifts,” Essek said, “One from myself and one from the Bright Queen.”

All eyes turned to Jester. “I didn’t tell her!” Jester gasped, “I would never bother her with anything that wasn’t super, super important. Not that your birthday isn’t important, Caleb, but-“

“I was the one who told her,” Essek offered, “Was that a faux pas?”

There was an awkward silence as the members of the Nein glanced at each other, waiting for someone to speak up.

“No,” Fjord spoke up, “It’s just a bit unexpected.”

“Was, uh, was that a factor in the sun being out today?” Caleb asked.

“Partially,” Essek said with a smile, pulling a parcel out from under his robe, “This is from her.”

Opening the package, Caleb discovered a black silk cloak with an intricate silver pattern that was so beautiful and delicate that he almost didn’t recognize it as a spider web.

“It’s so pretty!” Jester squealed, “Very goth!”

“And very powerful,” Essek added, “I’m sure you’ll find it very useful in your adventures.”

“Ja, I’m sure I will,” Caleb said, tracing the silver embroidery with his finger. He would need to do some casting to get a better idea of what this could do, but he could tell that it was extremely magical.

“And this is from me,” a scroll appeared in Essek’s hand, “It’s a spell of my own creation that I’ve been experimenting with. I look forward to your feedback.”

Caleb took the scroll and began to read through the spell. It was complicated, one of the most complicated he’d ever seen.

“Is this… what I think it is?”

“I’ve been calling it the Omega Thirteen, though I’m open to name suggestions. It reverses time by thirteen seconds exactly and allows you and five others to remember the previous timeline and act accordingly.”

“Holy shit,” Beau whispered.

“That’s some crazy ass shit,” Fjord agreed.

“Who’d like some cake?” Caduceus suggested.

And with that, he brought out the prinzregententorte, a cake made of layers of sponge, chocolate icing, and apricot jam all covered in a chocolate glaze. The conversation was slowing to a relaxed pace, as stories were swapped and compliments were being thrown around. After a slice of cake and a final drink, Essek rose from his place at the table.

“Well, this had been lovely, but I think it’s about time I go.”

“Thank you for coming, Essek!” Jester shouted. The Shadowhand smiled at her.

“Thank you for having me.”

“I will walk you to the door, ja?” Caleb offered, standing up as well.

They left the dining room and, as they did, Caleb could hear a teasing “oooh,” from his friends.

“I, uh, I hope you’ve enjoyed yourself,” Caleb muttered, “We can be a lot, but I-“

“It has been an unusual night; one I can’t imagine forgetting anytime soon.”

They reached the door.

“Thank you for everything,” Caleb said, turning to look at the Drow man, “Not just tonight but for… everything. We owe you a great deal, particularly me.”

Essek smiled at him in that typical, hard to read way of his.

“You owe less than you think. I enjoy spending time with you all, and you are a gifted pupil.”

The praise and the eye contact were getting to be a bit much for him, so Caleb began looking at his fancy new coat.

“I hope this can become a yearly tradition. Elves only celebrate every twentieth year or so, and I rather enjoyed the piñata.”

There was a pause, and Caleb looked up to see Essek staring intently at him with a smile.

“Goodnight, Caleb. Happy birthday.”

And with that, Essek Theyliss opened the door and walked out into the night. Caleb stood by the door and watched until he had turned the corner and could be seen no more before returning to the dining room.

“Did you kiss him?” Beau asked as soon as he walked in.

Everyone stared at her, nonplussed.

“We were all thinking it,” she muttered, crossing her arms.

Chuckling, Caleb walked around the table to her and rested his forehead against hers. They kept their foreheads pressed together, both releasing some of their tension, for a few moments before Beau pulled away with an affectionate pat on his shoulder.

“Did you… have you enjoyed today?” Fjord asked him. Caleb turned to the rest of the table.

“Ja, today has been the best day I’ve had… in a long time. You are all… extremely kind, too kind, and I appreciate that greatly.”

“We love you, Caleb!” Jester squealed, “But if it’s okay, I think I’m gonna go to bed now, okay?”

No one had a chance to respond before she got up, walked over to Caleb, planted a kiss on his cheek, and walked out of the room.

“I’m gonna, uh, make sure she gets to bed okay,” Beau said, standing up as she did so. “Night, man,” she added with a pat on Caleb’s shoulder, “Happy birthday.”

“Goodnight, Beauregard.”

There was silence in the room as the rest of them watched Beau follow Jester out of the room. Caleb picked up one of the books, _Murder at Manderly_, and began to flip through the pages, taking in that wonderful new book smell.

“So today was a good birthday?” Fjord asked again.

“Ja, today was very good,” he mumbled, “I think I’m gonna… go to bed.”

Caleb began to stack his new books into a pile before carefully trying to balance the cloak, the bracers, the cat toy…

“Do you wanna hand with all that?” Caduceus offered. Caleb nodded.

“Yes please.”

Caduceus picked up all the non-book items, which was much easier for him to manage given his size, and began walking away.

“Night, Caleb,” Fjord said, ruffling his hair. It shouldn’t have felt good, but it did. It was okay because it was Fjord, his friend. “Happy birthday.”

“Happy birthday, Caleb,” Yasha added, “Goodnight.”

“Danke,” he said, looking at both of them, hoping that his face was conveying just how much he meant it, “For everything.”

He took his books and went to his bedroom, where Caduceus was carefully placing the gifts on his nightstand. Turning around to look at him, the firbolg smiled.

“It’s been a great day, hasn’t it?”

“Ja,” he agreed, “It’s been very… strange for me.”

Though Caduceus didn’t stop smiling, Caleb could see a shift in his face, his intensity. “You know you’re allowed to have good days, right, Mr. Caleb? You know you’re allowed-you deserve to be happy.”

Caleb tried to repress his guilt, his self-loathing, all of it. That could wait until tomorrow, couldn’t it? He could be happy for just a little while longer, couldn’t he?

“Goodnight, Mr. Caleb,” Caduceus said, placing a hand on his shoulder, “I hope it’s been a good one.”

And with that, Caduceus left, leaving Caleb alone for only the second time today. It had been wonderful being on the receiving end of his friends’ affection, but he was exhausted. He collapsed onto the bed while also snapping Frumpkin to him, ensuring that his cat was curled up on his chest the moment he laid down. His cat gently nuzzled his chin, and Caleb obliged him by scratching behind his ear. Eventually, Frumpkin curled up on his chest, gently purring, leaving Caleb to lay there and process the day.

“Caleb?” Nott’s voice came from the door. He turned to see her staring at him from the door. “Can I come in?”

He nodded and watched as she crossed the room and climbed up next to him. Instinctively, Caleb moved so that Nott fit better on the bed.

“It’s been a good day?” she asked gently, running a finger through his hair.

“Ja,” he agreed.

“Happy birthday,” she whispered. And as he listened to Frumpkin’s purring and Nott’s breathing, feeling both of their presence, he felt himself starting to fall asleep. With his eyelids growing heavy, Caleb smiled. It had been a good day. And even if he didn’t deserve it, he had enjoyed his good day.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed it! This was a really fun fic for me to get to work on. I especially enjoyed getting to do a bit of research into my German heritage. As always, please please please take a second and tell me what you thought. It really does mean the absolute world to me. Toodles!


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